Just another day in...

Paradise?? Well honestly it's just another day in a coffee induced state of awakeness. It's been one of those days...you other moms know what I mean. One of the days that getting stuff done seems impossible, your child is fussy without reason and is hard to comfort, the dog has been exceptionally whiney and needy, in the attempt to do laundry today a load is still in the washer after 2 hours waiting to be switched, homework, is only about half done and barely understandable in the first place, and I am on my 5th cup of coffee. Yes, that's right you read it right. My 5th!!!!

As you read this you may also be asking well what is she doning blogging if she has all that to do...well in case you aren't a parent the idea of getting to do what you want when you want as a paretn is non existent (I know that even non-parents don't have that luxury all the time either...but they usually get it more than parents do)! This is the first time I have been able to sit down and have a few minutes to myself and I am taking the chance and deciding to blog. *Shakes finger at myself* Bad mommy!

So back to my day! I firmly believe I should be taking a stock in coffee and I can definitely confirm that since joining the ranks of mommyhood I have trie numerous roasts, flavored, non flavored, and dozens of different flavors of creamers as well. I think that the coffee companies probably make a pretty penny from my investment in their products. Oh...and the best coffee drink by far I can't make but invest money into on a basis far too often then it should be....the Vanilla Light Starbuck's Energy Drink!!!!! So good and the thought makes me even more thirsty for one!

Ok back to the ongoings of life. Last week was spring break and it was very uneventful, the no classes was great but Randy had a painful abcess so that consumed two days of trying to even figure out what it was how to fix the pain and a urgent care visit and 297 dollars later he is now fine and we are thankful to have gotten it fixed. Then for one of the ideas I had the worst headache that I have EVER had in my life so it resulted in my laying on the couch when Aspen was occupied while Randy worked and praying that she would stay content and occupied until my headache finally went away. Thank God t finally went away. St. Patrick's Day consisted of me going to AWANA since I am the director and that was not the way I really wanted to spend St. Patty's but alas I had no choice. Oh and on a side note I don't have to Direct for them next year and I am passing the reigns to someone else. So glad to be able to have my Wednesday nights back. And I digressed again...

So I hear Aspen stirring in her room already so WOOT for that 20minute nap. Thank God she at least sleeps through the night. But I will leave you with these pictures. Aspen on St. Patty's with her Clover headband, one with her dad, and I also decided to pain her toes last Friday and so there is a picture of your cute pudgy feet...oh and one in her jumper..cause she jsut looked so stinking cute! Enjoy.

It's a miracle...

Posts 2 days in a row...who h=would have imagined that happening...but there is a reason. We have the conference this weekend and naturally I should be packing Aspen's bag for grandma Linda's. One little problem though...I put Aspen down for a nap in her room...and yes that's right her room is where all her stuff is that needs to be packed...do I dare go in and start packing and risk disturbing the sleeping giant...lol! Nope nope I think not...so alas I sit here and drink my coffee and wait for Randy to get home from work this morning.

Oh and the question that I am sure that is on everyone's mind after my last post.......the answer to where I slept last night.....*drumroll plays*
On the floor of her room...yes folks, I was that mother that is having a hard time letting her baby get older and I slept right next to her crib on the floor so I could easily check on her and Goliath curled up and slet next to me as well. That sleeping arrangement last until 5am when Randy got up for work, he woke me up and I moved to the bed for the last hour and a half or so of her sleep.
Definitely NEVER thought I would be this kind of mother and the emotional wreck Aspen has turned me into. But it is all worth it... I can not imagine life without her. Everytime I think about the moms that lose their babies or all different reasons my heart breaks and I feel saddened that the precious gifts would be taken from them. Like precious Olivia, I would be such a wreck after losing a child and her mother is such a strong woman. I can not believe how well she has perservered. I know that it can't be easy for her but she still keeps going. Olivia was beautiful and she has a story that will forever live in my heart. Then my dear friend that had to give birth to her sleeping baby boy on her actual due date...made it all the way to her 40 week appointment to find out his heart stopped beating. I just can't fathom the heartache. Everytime I think of these stories I hug Aspen a little tighter and when I am frustrated with her their stories remind me that I am getting to experience something that others do not no matter how hard they wish. I will forever be astounded by the women and the heartache they went through and they still carry it with them. I am grateful that I have my baby girl and will never understand why God takes some babies home before they ever really live. But his plan is the ultimate and I truly think that maybe they really were just too beautiful for Earth.

School will be the death of me...

So being a mother is the most amazing thing in my life that I have been able to experience. But add being a student in there and I feel like my life is just overly stretched out. I want to finish school but sometimes I get so tired and frustrated with it all that I sometimes wish I could quit...but then I have to remember that Randy probably has it so much worse then I do...he does school, being a father, and work. So I know he proabably has the stress even worse.

On an Aspen update she is almost 5 and 1/2 months old and getting bigger by the day. Even though she is growing she is still small for her age she is only 15lbs and 24inches long but because of her body shape and size she is still wearing 0-3 month clothes. She is still as adorable as ever and I feel blessed every day when she looks at me and smiles. The gift of motherhood is amazing and she is truly my greatest treasure in life. Oh...and Aspen is starting to teach me that she is not so little anymore. She has still been sleeping in the playpen bassinet next to my side of the bed and love being able to roll over and check on her during the night. But tonight Randy went to bed and when I tried to put her to bed she kept moving around, kicking the sides of the bassinet and just being very difficult. Randy was frustrated because he has to be up early in the morning and she was keeping him awake. So I took her and rocked her for awhile and even that didn't appease her. So I finally reluctantly put her in her crib and within 5 minutes she was out. I am so nervous about leaving her in there tonight...and wouldn't be surprised if I end up sleeping in there tonight I have become so emotional as a mom...I found myself crying today about the fact that she is soon to be 6months old. It seems like just yesterday she was born. Motherhood definitely has changed me in ways I never thought.

Now to let you guys in more on Randy and I...we are good beyond the whole busyness of life. This weekend I am psyched that we get to go to the "Weekend to Remember" marriage conference at the Hilton downtown. We went last year and loved it so I am so excited to go back and brush up on the skils we learned and to really get to spend some quality time with just Randy and I...it has been so long since we have had quality time together. Aspen will be with Grandma Linda and Grandpa Kim for the weekend. I know she will be perfectly fine and completely trust Linda with Aspen but I just can't help feel nervous more for me then for her. I will miss her.

I think that is about all I have for today...if you have made it to the end then I would have to give props to you! Hope God blesses you this weekend and I will update this next week (I will be on spring break next week).

Life has gotten crazy...

Things are crazy busy...but I did want to update people on Aspen she is 13 pounds now...she'll be 5 months this weekend and here are some of her 4 month photos by Zimmermann Photography! She is such a cutie...I love her so much!

I'm such a bad blogger...

Things have been so insanely busy the last two weeks so blogging has been a difficult task but here I am. I am blogging from my university library because I am inbetween classes right now which is part of the reason why I have gotten so crazy busy. I knew that going to school would be hard with Aspen but it is definitely not hard in the sense I thought it would be. The hardest part is when I have to leave her. I hate leaving her especially on Thursdays when I have to go almost 12 hours without seeing her. I really start to miss her smiles and her cuddles and I honestly at times want to try and go see her in between classes but she is literally all the way across town at my grandmother's house and the gas and the time it would take would only give me about 10 minutes or so with her before I would have to try and come back to the school and find parking again. SO Thursdays are the day of the week I hate the most because of my lack of Aspen time. Beyond school starting things are going ok, finances are still tight but we work through it and God has provided for us every step of the way. We have been trying to make it a point to get together with friends we haven't gotten to see much, we are hanging out with some this weekend which I am very excited for. One of the couples has a 8 month old so the adults are going to have dinner and watch a movie while the babies have a little play-date and hopefully fall asleep.
Beyond that everything is going pretty typical. Oh...my vent for today though...in the area of Omaha there are different counties which is typical of any area. But the prices to license your pet differ so much between the different counties and it is ridiculous. We have to pay 50 dollars for our boxer Goliath. But the previous owners in the next county over only had to pay 15! The price differences are so STUPID and I think very much uncalled for. Ok my vent for the day is over. Hope this finds everyone else doing well! Thank God it's almost the weekend again!

My Baby Favorites...

I have friends who are either pregnant, trying to get pregnant, or will be pregnant in the next 5 years. So I thought I would share what some of my favorite items I have that I use daily with Aspen.



The first item is Munchkin brand and can be found at Target. It is a great way to clean bottles in the dishwsher by making it easy to keep everything together, and even has space for straws or in my case the center air filters off of the Dr. Brown's bottle I use. I think it was only 6 dollars and well worth the money.

The second is a great car seat toy. It plays music, has a rattle and creates something fun to look at. Aspen is not normally a big fan of her car seat but you start the music on this and she quiets right down and stares at the flashing cheeks of the flower. This is also found at Target and cost 15 dollars.

The third one is a car seat cover. Especially if your baby is going to be little in winter. It has proven a great use to us with this bitter cold winter. It has a flap that is able to come up when you are inside and want to see baby, and it goes down when outside to protect babies face from the snow and cold temperatures.

This next one is a travel system. Ours us a little different. We have one made by Eddie Bauer. It makes a great when ou want to go on a walk or are going to the mall. The car seat fits right inside it. It has a place to store your diaper bag underneath. And it even has cup holders...I LOVE IT! You can get travel systems at numerous places and they all vary in price.

This on is what is called a temporal scanner. It can be found at Target for around 30 dollars. It is a thermometer that is very accurate. I got after numerous failed attempts at getting Aspen's temperature. I don't like the idea of sticking a thermometer in her butt, and she hated when I would put the thermometer under her arm. So her pediatrician recommended this one and said that it is a very accurate way to get her temperature without making her uncomfortable. So I picked one up and I LOVE LOVE LOVE it! Taking her temp has become so easy. It is so worth the money.

This is called the Soothe and Glow Seahorse. We got it at a baby shower but I have seen them available at Target as well. We never really thought to use it until she was almost a 2 months old and she was having a night where she was "inconsolable." I saw it sitting in her room and decided to give it a try. I pushed the belly and it started playing soft music while it's belly glowed. She was dead asleep in a matter of minutes. I was amazed. It still works wonders for us. When she is tired and cranky we lay her down with it or put it on the tray of the swing with her and turn it on and she goes out rather quickly. The music plays for about 4 or 5 minutes. A few times we have had to push the belly one ore time before she is out. But she loves it and even will grab grab onto it in a hugging manner sometimes when she is next to it. We named it "Sammy" for her. They also have the seahorse available in pink. We like that we got the blue one though because we will be able to use it for the next baby even if it's a boy without feeling the guilt of a little boy having a bunch of pink stuff!:)

This diaper bag is Carter's brand. It can be found at Babies R Us for 40 dollars and it is amazing. I originally had a different diaper bag that I thought would be great. But quickly learned it did not have enough room for all the stuff I needed and wanted to carry in it. A friend had this diaper bag and I adored how much room there was in it and it is very cute. So I went and picked it up and have discovered that it is well worth the money. It carries everything and I even have a little extra room sometimes.

Ok...so Aspen is not using her highchair yet. But this high chair was given to us by friends that decided they are done having kids. And we adore it. It fits in beautifully with out kitchen and isn't as gaudy as a lot of the high chairs out there. It's not very often that you can find decent wood high chairs. I have seen these high chairs on amazon.com but I am not sure what their price was and I am not sure what store they could be found in. I do know that Target doesn't carry this kind of highchair though.

Ah...and the infamous Dr. Brown's bottle. I will NEVER use anything else for any of our future kids. They have a few extra parts than other bottles but using the munchkin dishwasher bottle part holder that was number one on my list makes everything a cinch to wash. They reduce the amount of gas that Aspen gets and I have never had any issues with these bottles. Aspen prefers these over other bottles as well. We tried Playtex Ventaire bottles once and she didn't like those at all. Dr. Brown's bottle can be found at Target, Babies R Us, Bakers, Wal Mart, etc. Target sells them in 3 packs for 13 dollars...btu we have resorted to getting them from Baker's. At Baker's you can buy a three pack for 7 dollars.

Carter's Sleepers like the one above are must haves. They have them in heavy fleece for winter and in light cotton for warmer months and they are so cute. You can find them pretty cheap at Target and they are great for days that you don't feel like dressing the baby in a regular outfit or when you are hanging around the hosue. They also have snap buttons in th elegs which make the diaper changing very easy.

Last but not least it the Butt Paste. Which is my opinion and experience with Aspen is the best thing for her diaper rashes. It is a cream that is sensitive enough on baby skin that you can use some every day as a "preventative" measure against diaper rash. Since we started using it she has had no diaper rashes. You can find the size tube in this picture for about 4 dollars at Target and I am not sure what the price would be at Babies R Us.

Thanks for reading and I hope I gave you some good ideas to keep in mind for your baby.

It's official...

Me heart is definitely not whole. I have been realizing more and more over the last two weeks that my heart is in fact fragile and not whole. The snow and the possibility of Randy and Aspen getting hurt actually makes me that neurotic mom that most people hate. The day that I had given my life to Christ and stopped living for myself, my heart was full and whole. Then came the day when I met Randy and as we dated and started to get to know eachother I fell head over heals in love with him and the day we said "I do" a piece of my heart was given to him and will always be with him. Then the day that we found out I was pregnant I felt a piece of my heart coming off again. This time to be kept with Aspen as she grew inside me and now as she grows outside of me. I constantly worry about both Randy and Aspen when I am not with them hoping that they are safe and ok. I knew it was normal to worry a bit but I felt like my worry was more than just a bit. Then the day we got in the car accident. I cried more than I ever thought I could. I cried because in the car was Randy, Aspen, Me, and my sister Kassandra. The thoughts of what could have happened to us made me break down and I have never held on to Aspen so hard as I did that night after the accident. I thank God everyday that we were not hurt and the only thing that was hurt was my car, which is fixable. So every day there are three pieces of heart that are in this world. Rany carries one deep in him and always will, Aspen had a piece grow inside her as she grew in me. When we have more kids I know that they to will carry a piece of my heart as well. Having your heart in pieces can be one of the most amazing feelings there is but also one of the most frightening. I now understand my grandma and her neurotic feelings for everyone in the family. But I have realized they aren't so neurotic. Amazing that it took getting married and having a kid to finally get it. But hey at least I got it right? My heart will never be whole again but knowing the love that comes along with that makes it so worth it. So here is a glimpse of the other 2 pieces of my heart and when the three are put together!